January 6 - Epiphany - waves and rocks

Today we had some big"ish" surf and a high tide in the morning - so I ran down to the boardwalk before Tim went to work to check it out.  Not the biggest I have seen here, but fun to take some pics of the waves on and the rocks.

January 5 - To the Beach on my Own

This was the first day that I made it to the beach by myself.  Dara was at school and we had plans for the rest of the day, so I needed to make a quick stop after running errands.  I parked at a place a little further away from our house that I wouldn't likely walk to just to get a different feel.  I have run on the path by this area a number of times, but I had never walked on the beach here.  It was really quite lovely.

The other interesting part of this trip is that there were police officers blocking one of the lanes on Harbor Drive.  I never did find out what happened or why they were there, but it did make me a little more cautious about where I was walking (both on the beach and crossing the street)

view of the pier

shadow in the water

hand in the water

January 4 - Dancing in the Sand

Believe it or not I was not sure I would get Dara to the beach today - she suggested going to just about every other park in walking distance - of course once we did get to the beach this is what she looked like.








and yes we did get our feet in the water

January 3 - A surprise Picnic with Friends

After school on Tuesday I thought Dara and I would make a quick run to the beach before heading home for lunch and a nap.  As we walked we met up with a friend of hers from school (along with her mom and sister) as they were heading for a picnic at a nearby park.  As the girls began to play I was talking with the mother about what we were going to do and she asked if they could tag along.  She had planned a picnic lunch for her girls and there was plenty to share.  So the 5 of us stopped be her house to grab an extra part to their stroller and off we went to the beach.

The girls had a great time (as did the moms getting to know one another).  What a fun adventure this is turning out to be!

feet in the water??  well at least the wet sand

oh - there's the water

picnic friends, Lucy, Eli, Dara and Sara

January 2 - A family affair

As Tim and I have been talking about me getting down to the ocean every day Dara has decided that she also needs to be a part of this.  I was telling her that I was going to touch the water every day, but I was not sure that she needed to.  she replied "yes I do mom.  I need to touch the ocean every day".  Well who can argue with that?  This is one little girl who really loves the ocean.  And it is good to hear her talk about it now at almost 3 years old.  Still not sure she will touch the ocean every day - but I bet she will get there with me most days this month.

January 2 - at the beach with Dara and Tim . . .

in the water

it is colder that it looks

Dara and Tim swinging at sunset

sunset and the pier from the foot bridge

January 1, 2012 - Back to the Beach

Beginning a new year always brings some sense for new beginnings, for a chance to do things new and different, opportunities to make life better, more meaningful, more exciting.  Sometimes it is the little things that help those changes to happen.

I generally think that one can start these "new beginnings" at anytime.  And most of the time can be making little changes with intention.  This year I am living with the word "intention". 

During the month of January I have committed to touching the ocean every day.  As a Minnesotan living in SoCal it seems like this is a wonderful opportunity.  We live close enough to walk - why not touch the ocean every day?

And so it begins - a chronicle of the experiences at the shore.

January 1 began as a snowy winter morning in MN.  After a very brown and warm Christmas we did finally get to see some snow (which Dara helped to shovel) before hopping on a plane back to sunny CA.  That evening we enjoyed some fish tacos on the Pier with our good friends and the feel of water and sand in my toes.  We are indeed fortunate to live in Ventura.

Dara helping Grandpa shovel

feet in the cold water

some interesting snow/dust like substance as the sun set

touching the water with my fingers - brrr.

dinner with the Jones family

learn, know, teach.

We create and re-create ourselves in a constant flow of energy. There are places that we practice this flow in safe waters and there are places that we teach. I read somewhere recently (probably on a Yogi Tea tea bag) "to learn - read, to know - write, to master - teach". That is the flow we live in. So we keep learning, knowing and teaching. Thus is the life of a daughter, sister, mother, pastor, healer, creature of earth.

(this picture is a piece I created for a Profile Book celebrating my work as a Pastor, Healer, mother, athlete . . .)

surfing

It has been about four months since my last surfing adventure. Last November Tim and I went to Costa Rica with Tim's brother and sister-in-law (Jonathan and Gretchen) and our friends Jeff and Kerri. I must say it was much warmer and a lot less crowded, but that's a different story.

Lately I have been coaxed out again into the cold waters of Southern California by Tim and our friends Erin and Bryan. We have had beautiful days, warm and amazing sunshine and with wet suits, booties and gloves I must say one gets toasty.

I recently learned that I really like the sorter boards - smaller, easier to manage. And I have been able to catch a few small waves in the white water. I once even got a nice "cut" in one (mom, please read that as "I was able to turn the board while standing on it").

Although I have learned much of the surf lingo (more than the "how-to") there are still a few things that I think need some language. Like when you get tossed of a wave and get some help with the snot knocked out of you - literally. What is that called? A salt-water nasal enima? Maybe I heard that somewhere. It's like the "farmer's blow" only with some help . . .

Anyway - what I think I like best (to quote my nephew) is the taste of the water. There is just nothing like salt water washing over you . . .

a good point

well - there are many reasons that we make the choices that we make in life. after reading this article I am both convicted and hopeful.

only perfect practice makes perfect

I can't say that I am really trying to be perfect here - this is just the expression that I remember being framed on my piano teacher's wall in her piano room. I remember looking at it often and thinking to myself - "what fun is that". But I do remember it vividly and I often am reminded of that quote - and again, not because I want to be perfect. It is more a reminder for me to PRACTICE. that's where I lose it. I am more of an improvisor really, but that only gets one so far.

I have been reading some posts from my sister-in-law's blog The Late Shift at the SageMart and as always she has inspired me. Generally at Christmas time I wait for her Christmas letter to come and I imagine that it is possible to be as witty as she is and as well equipped to turn phrases, and then I get started and I realize how desperately out of practice I am.

So I pick at it again here, and maybe a class or two will be in my future . . .

remembering hope and creating hope

I am sitting in my office, listening to the gentle hum of the fans we have running in the house (we don't have an air conditioner) and doing some reading on the web.

As I was surfing through a few of the blogs I regularly read I found myself watching some clips from the Daily Show. (We don't get cable and I love this show so when I find myself in a place where I can get little clips I soak it in - like candy and cookies, cable access to shows I love are better kept out of the house and/or I have to have some really strong resolve to only take small doses).

Anyway, I was watching some clips and I came across "Jon Stewart Post 9/11 Speech. It was a poignant reminder for me of that day, but more importantly of the fleeting moments of clarity that we have in life, Celtic traditions refer to these times as the "thin places". Beyond the fear, past the anger, in the middle of the rips and tears in our hearts, I remember the undeniable moments of oneness. And not just oneness with the people of this country - but the world. There was oneness with the world.

I live in a place where the "Christian voice" would have us believe that there is only oneness within the realm of Christianity. All to often when I go to worship with other Christians I leave feeling lost, depressed, misplaced, and I have no trouble identifying with those who reject the church. But I cannot bring myself to walk away from these practices, I cannot leave the conversation, I am continually drawn to the "table" for the hope of this oneness. Not the oneness of assimilation, or that we conform to the same practices and lifestyles and beliefs.

It is the oneness of sharing this same time and space on earth. The oneness that we are of the human race, the oneness that we are a world community, a world of people that may be worlds apart, but world citizens together.

It is that hope in which I live. It is that vision of the Kingdom of God for which I work and live and seek. It is that hope that continues to draw me into these conversations of faith and culture and remembering.

Thanks also to Mary Hess who refered to the unrest of the world through the dailyKos.

I still see hope

driving cars and "being green"

I have been going through a moderately comical and frantic "the world is dying" melodrama over the past few weeks.

thankfully moving past the hopelessness of "what can I do to save to world", to the hopefullness of "what can I do to effectively be a part of saving the world".

so . . . here is one thing I can start . . . interesting information and "little things" we can do together -

here is the first -

check it out

for san diegans and mostly west coast

for minnesotans and mostly east coast

for other tips and information on easy ways to "be green" check out
this for at home

and

this for at work


more to come . . .

building a cathedral

ok - i have been "offline" for a few weeks. Disconnected, disassociated, disinterested. Thank you to those of you who reminded me that this writing stuff isn't really just for me - getting out of myself.

well, today was a good day to start letting myself be re-introduced back into the blog sphere.

I ran across this illustration posted on the blog of Andrew Jones

anyway - the whole thing about planting a grove of oak trees made me think of two things directly related to my life in the past few weeks.

1) - the obvious, church planting. what I have done here, or have not done here, may not show up for many years - but I can at the very least, trust that the Holy Spirit is at work through me - and through the connections and relationships that are being built.

2) - last week I was in MN and I went to visit my grandma, who is living in the same homestead where she grew up - but now it belongs to my aunt and uncle. So as asked my aunt to show me around the yard and tell me what they have done, and what she has planted. (they have really created a beautiful space). At the very edge of the yard where the lawn and the grove and the field all meet, my aunt pointed out to me a small twig - the beginning of an oak tree.

I've been told that it is difficult (or ill-advised) to try to re-locate an oak, because of the long dorsal root that grows strait down into the earth. If you want an oak somewhere, you have to start it with an acorn! They also take a long time to grow and produce acorns

When I asked about who long it would take to grow, my aunt looked at me and said "We will never sit under the shade of this tree."

All this causes me to wonder about the wisdom of our culture. The Oak produces such a rich array of imagery and symbolism and strength. And we plant them - never being able to harvest the benefits - yet we plant trees.

I guess - like the promises given to Abraham, and Moses - we trust that the good seeds we sow into the earth will be a blessing to future generations.

podcast

Hey all -

Check the reforming church website out.

I was interviewed a few weeks ago on contextual theology and what it means to "be the church". The entry on May 1st is a short conversation/interview about 20 minutes between Brian Spahr and myself - and I have to say - Brian really made me sound good - what fun!

links

Here is a music video - by Pink

It is a powerful message, thanks to my friend Annette for sharing it with me.

Easter

This past week brought to my attention the memory and importance of ritual in our lives.

Tim and I attended a Saturday evening service (which I was expecting to be a kind of Easter Vigil). What the service entailed was actually the retelling of our salvation history, from Old Testament stories of salvation – to the raising of Christ. What I did not expect was my reaction. In the middle of the service they started taking down the dark paraments (the cloths that cover the furniture in the front of the church) and started putting up the Easter colors. I turned to Tim and said – “we need to leave right now’. I was not at all prepared to celebrate Easter on a night that I expected to be taken to the depths of sorrow that were experienced by the disciples.

For me there is great importance to the rhythm and ritual of season. Maybe it is a Minnesotan thing – but spring is all the more beautiful after a cold harsh winter. And the warmth of the sun is much more comforting and radiant after days of gloom and cold. That is like the Easter rhythm for me. There is nothing greater than to experience the joy of freedom after the taste of our bondage to sin and death. To be re-united with Christ after having remembered what it is like to have lost hope.

And when the sun rises on Easter morning, after the dark of the night – we are reminded that the light broke into the darkness. It is the memory of Christ death and resurrection that gives us pause to be able to rejoice.

On Easter morning – we went to a sunrise service on the beach. What a different experience. We got up early because I was helping to lead the service – but just to gather with a group of people some of whom planned to be there and some of whom “happened by”. And knowing the preparations for that morning happened in the deepest part of the night.

God works sometimes in the depths of our darkness. And when the light comes to shine on the changes they are startling, miraculous, and often worth the sorrow we have walked through to witness the story.

May this Easter season be filled with the dawning of God in your life.

how well do we know . . .

I have been recently having some email conversations with a colleague of mine - and this morning as I was writing to him, and complaining about being sent out here on my own - I have the realization that Jesus may possibly have known these men that he called to follow him.

While to many people that might not be anything earth shattering, or inspiring, I think there are some very important lessons that we – as people, as leaders, as members of communities – can learn.

As a church it has always seemed odd to me that we send people out one by one (not a very biblical model anyway you put it). But we also find these crazy people who take on the challenge (me being a prime example) because we believe that God is calling us to “go”.

It occurred to me this morning that Jesus most likely knew most of the people in the small town of Nazareth – (maybe this has a bigger role to play than we have paid attention to before). And growing up in that small town were also a number men (an women) who became followers. Jesus most likely knew quite a bit about James and John – and for that matter their father Zebedee. I guess it had always been my assumption that the God-ness of Jesus led him to “know” who to call. I am just beginning to understand some of the ordinary ways that god works through the ways of humanity.

Jesus maybe saw much more in these men than we might, but we also know who are the good leaders of our communities, those people that we think could be great leaders, those people that we think will change the world.

So how well do we know the people around us? As someone just getting to know this community it puts another challenge in front of me. Not only who are the movers and shakers in this place here and now, but also who are the potential changers of the world!

april

I went for a long bike ride the other day. It's a reminder for me of why I really like living in Southern California. It is a great time to be out and enjoying the world. Biking is the one time that my mind is truely focused on the one thing that I am doing. Other forms of excersize like running and swimming are great times for me to meditate - and plan and vision what is coming in the days and weeks ahead - but when I bike - it is all me and the bike.

(for those of you who watch LOST - I named my bike Mr. Eko. There is some spiritual/religious power, raw strength and faith in that character - even with (or maybe because of) his life story.)

I continue to seek these things in life - where I can just be.

Saving the World

I went out for dinner with some people from the tri club the other night. These gatherings (and workouts for that matter) are always hard for me to go too – it is another thing I do on my own – and although I am outgoing in my work – it is sometimes hard to continue to do in my personal time.

Anyway – during dinner the wife of the ironman coach got up to leave for church. So the conversation turned to the subject of church and faith for this couple. After a few minutes the coach turned to a conversation with a few people sitting at the other end of the table and a woman who I had met earlier in the evening made a comment about me being a pastor. Well . . . that set a few others at the table off about how that was so great and I must be so proud of that (blah blah blah).

Frankly, although I am glad for my “profession” it is not something that I would announce – anymore than someone who is a teacher or a mechanical engineer or a CFO. Actually - there are many situations in which I try to turn the focus from what I “do” because I am not sure if I am “up” for the reactions. And this evening in particular when it was hard to get myself to be open enough to go out to dinner with a group of people that I did not know . . .

So I was very frank about my hesitation in telling people – and why – and this woman sitting across from me again said, “Why? You should be so proud and so glad. What you do is so important. It matters to people. It’s not like you are just working at the corner store or something – You’re making a difference. You are changing the world!”

Well what do you say to that!!!!

My first reaction was to graciously agree – “yes I am proud to do what I do, and yes it does make a difference” – saying nothing about changing the world – really we all do that – but before I could get anything else out the questions started to pour about women in the church and faith and scripture and differences between men and women . . . I was so grateful for the focus moving away from me – and impressed with the thoughtfulness and intelligence of these people sitting around me . . .

As I reflect back on those comments – I realize that there was a lot of power for me there. This was a blessing – this woman was blessing me . . .

In a “humble” response, I would comment that we all change the world – I am only playing my small part. It just happens to be more visible and vocal than others, even the person who works at the “corner store” is making a difference

In a “grateful” response, I would again comment on the pride that this woman gave me in what I get to do. I do get to make a difference. It is my privilege to tell the stories of where God is active in the world and give people language and hope in that vision.

In an “indebted” response it is a great weight and responsibility to have that expectation placed upon the occupation of pastor.

And again – a blessing – I get to be a part of changing the world!

The profundity of triathlons.

OK – so while more people would not think that triathlons in themselves are all that “profound” you have to at least admit that “profundity” is a fun word to say . . .

For those of you relatively new to my world – I am a triathlete. My sister and I ran an iroman in 2003 and we are now training for Ironman Wisconsin (which takes place in Madison Wisconsin on September 10, 2006 – for those of you who want to be a part of our cheering squad!)

These past few months Triathlete magazine has been running a series by Scott Tinley (who in the world of triathlon may just be considered “the man”). Here are a few quotes of his (from the January and march issues of Triathlete Magazine)

“Thirty years ago I never thought multi-sport athletes would use their sport only to rub on as a balm that would protect them from the harsh realities of the world. And while I have nothing against those who do, it is those who peel back the layers, who open up the discourse and ask,” Is this good for all of us who have invested months and years of our lives into the idea that we take more from our events than a thin T-shirt and a canceled check?” They are the ones that will shape the next 30 years”

and

“What is important is that how we feel about ourselves keeps evolving as we learn and grow. Not as we change the channel or turn the page. And anyone can come to the dance, even, as Thoreau said, if they ‘hear a different drummer however measured or far away.’”

Although Tinley is talking about triathlons and the people who are a part of that community, it struck me that this is almost exactly what I would say about our churches and faith communities. There are so many who come to church communities to escape from the realities of the world – to hear a word of hope that tells them that they are “saved” or “redeemed”. It becomes a salve for those moments in the pews, behind the church doors. And while that certainly may be one reason for the church itself to exist, it is only one.

I have to admire and applaud those who are asking the tough questions about church, faith, communities, culture, Christianity, God and Jesus. (yes this at times includes me – I can admire myself right?). Those who are asking – “is this working?” “What exactly do we think we are doing?” “Can we work out our faith in different ways and different places?” “How can we be a place where we are able to express the love that Jesus taught us? – or Muhammad or Buddha or Elisha?”

I have learned more than I thought I would about myself, my faith, and my view of community from this world of triathlons. Funny how it is easier to reflect on something when you get yourself out of it . . .